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Whether you thought of as far as people are inclined to negative perception of life?

you are able to play that a musical instrument, perfectly know the higher mathematics, chemistry, physics, it is fine and without mistakes write texts, manage to read much, are much wrung out and perfectly get on with people? To demand from the child only good results on all directions at the same time and always.

It is possible to imagine a situation: the daughter brings you the diary.

And if the Driver (Brain) was more focused on a positive?

B.'s example Bad news about other people turned out privyazchivy, than good. People paid more attention to them, argued on them more, remembered longer and attached them bigger significance at assessment of the person in general. Such scheme is so steady that the researchers dealing with a problem of mutual perception thought up the special term: "positive and negative asymmetry".

When the Driver (Brain) sees that something goes well, he does not suspect this subject much.

& #171; Such negative orientation is not limited to emotions. All of us it is universal pulls to a negative. The group of psychologists carried out the review of two hundred articles and came to a conclusion that in a wide range of human behavior and perception there is true the following general principle: "Bad is stronger good".

And how many parents right there begin to frighten the child for a bad note? So what he madly is afraid to show then them that he somewhere made a gaffe which led to such assessment or that he somewhere is insufficiently talented, or has no qualities (perhaps, so far) how his parents would like?

And yesterday in Stodnevka (about this remarkable invention of Armen Petrosyan I will write somehow later), during usual discussion about quantity of the noticed pleasures during the day at different people, somehow suddenly I gave rise a thought, every day to note 100 pleasures of day.

When it comes about changes, one of characteristic features of our addiction to bad becomes crucial.

Present the world in which the wife kisses the husband who forgot about her birthday with words: "You from fourteen remembered thirteen years it! It is fine!"

Yesterday at me 60 pleasures turned out. And then, at the end of day I was crossed with one person who is often inclined to see negative in everything, and here especially on this contrast very well experienced also all advantage that I was focused all day on a positive. And well felt, how powerfully we can change consciously ourselves and circumstances, to paint our life with paints.

And somehow all this united for me in practice & #171;100 pleasures of day daily and without поблажек». Here you want - you do not want, and it is obliged to try to give 100 pieces)

Example of A. People to whom showed photos of bad and good events considered bad longer.

Therefore when your children study as the fours and the five, you especially do not think of their estimates. But when the three and the two begin to appear, you become the zealous teacher. If to think, it is quite strange, isn't that so? & #187;

On what you how the parent, you will concentrate?

It is tremendous. I to this concrete example thought a little of our tendency to try to discover problems and the bad parties in everything.

It is obviously not our world. But during changes it has to become such. Our Driver focuses on problems, and it is necessary to focus on decisions. If you the manager, wonder: "What percent of time at me leaves on the solution of problems and how many I spend for assessment of progress?" & #187;

And how many parents constantly gossip and discuss others, complain of problems with health, money, relationship instead of in a constructive manner discussing their decision and those measures which will bring in their life more joy, health, wealth?

Very striking example & #8212; the school student bringing marks.

Here, it is a little more from the book & #171; Heart перемен»:

How often parents will concentrate on its achievements and good marks, or at least to lack of bad marks in the majority of objects?

It, of course, not occupation for a daily praktikovaniye for the rest of life & #8212; because it quite trudozatratno, it is also necessary to fix all the time. That is is suitable more for those who have a work at a computer and who a lot of time spends in one place & #8212 at home houses, at office.

So, bad is stronger than good. As once the literary critic Lesley Fidler told, many writers became famous, describing matrimonial problems, but the successful novel about happy marriage did not appear yet

& #171; This example was thought up by the writer-sociologist Markus Bekinham.

To follow this example from Chip Hiz and Dan Hiz's book & #171; Heart of changes. How to try to obtain changes it is easy and надолго» (it is in general the good book about conscious changes in life).

Bekinham, by the way, has a series of books how as much as possible to use strengths of the person, but not to go in cycles in shortcomings.

Example of Century. Researchers considered seventeen works how people interpret and explain events in their life - for example as fans perceive sports events, and students describe the day in diaries. Vomnogy spheres - on production, in policy, sport and private life - people are more inclined to discuss spontaneously (and to try to explain) not good, but bad.

But as the tool for single or periodic sharpening to see in all joy and a positive & #8212; it is ideal. Therefore I plan to popraktikovat & #171;100 pleasures дня» daily until the end of the current Stodnevka & #8212; these are about 45 more days.

Plus I still read chapter from the book & #171 yesterday; Black город» about Fandorin where he keeps the diary (in fact is engaged in a frirayting) & #8212; it is called in Japanese & #171; Никки». It has a practice & #8212; every year to introduce some one new habit physical and one spiritual. And he decided to practice a frirayting year daily without any indulgences. And there was it:

You will seed a habit & #8212; you will reap character. You will seed character & #8212; you will reap destiny.

And it perfectly correlates with my current purpose & #8212; to introduce gradually in a habit all magic rules of Alexander Paliyenko about one of which I try to remember just for a long time & #8212; & #171; to see 3 good things in everything and in всех».

About the switch very much it is pleasant to me. It is strongly told.

& #171; Nickey should be conducted daily. Good reasons for which it would be allowed to take a break do not exist. Neither the disease, nor a grief, nor danger justification are. If you appeared in the desert without paper and a brush - scrape a stick on sand. If suffered ship-wreck and you float by sea on a board - the Vod a finger on water. & #187;

It is investigated and proved for a long time, but not just my thoughts.

Same nonsense in general, so strongly to worry concerning bad notes as it in us was inspired since the childhood various programs.

Let's call it concentration on problems.

For example, on the conducted researches, from the most popular words which we use for the description of our emotions only 1/4 & #8212; positive. And nearly 3/4 & #8212; negative.

This task is difficult, and is interesting to those.

Present the world, in which you would experience inflow of gratitude, every time when you press the switch and the room is filled with light.

Generally, I begin the Flashmob & #171;100 Pleasures of Dnya». Several people already joined. Try also you)

He claims that practically all parents are usually fixed on the two. It is easy to understand them: "It seems that something is not right. It is necessary to correct it. Let's find it the tutor! Or perhaps to punish her? Will not correct the two yet, will not go for a walk". Very seldom the parent who will tell comes across: "Five! What clear head! You, probably, perfectly understand a subject. Kind of to use it in the future?"

Here further from there:

But when something breaks, it switches in the mode of attention and begins to apply the skills according to the solution of problems.

It has one five, four fours and one two.

That is if there is any neutral event, then the majority will apprehend it as negative, a small part will see good and still absolutely small will apprehend it without duality and an emotional color.